Can't Help It
by princess-alice-malfoy-granger
Summary: She was always there for him, such a shame he will never know... i used one of my favorite songs, you don't need to listen while reading, but the video suits the plot! enjoy your reading! C:


Drew looks at me

I fake a smile so he won't see

That I want and I'm needin'

Everything that we should be

He had never noticed me, but since the war ended and we became Head Boy and Girl, we have grown and became very good friends. Harry and Ron will always be my best friends but with _him_ there was an almost instantaneous connection.

It all began when he asked me to help him in a Potions' homework. Who could ever say this would happen? I believe this was the beginning of the end. I've never seen him in this light before; but having him so close to me made me start thinking about the rumors about him. At the beginning it was no easy task, but after a while we left the last names aside and called us by our given names, the way it was supposed to be.

I'll bet she's beautiful

That girl he talks about

And she's got everything

That I have to live without

Lately, he has returned to the tower really happy, I didn't mind, I discovered he has a really cute smile. It is always the same routine; he comes and sits on the couch and starts talking about her. Of how beautiful she is, how she makes him laugh and how naïve she is. I can't help but think that she is perfect.

He hasn't named her yet but I don't really want to know anyways. Having her name constantly reminding me that I'm not her would hurt me badly. She has everything I'm lacking. I'm not ugly, I know that much; boys have been coming and coming asking me to go out with them. Who could ever predict that saving the Magical World would make me the "most wanted" among the male population? It seems my looks aren't enough for him.

Drew talks to me,

I laugh 'cause it's just so funny

I can't even see

Anyone when he's with me

We find each other on the hallways and we stop what we are doing just to have a little chitchat. I've been arriving late to my classes just to spend some more alone time with him. It feels so natural talking to him now; as if I needed to do it all week. As if it were my lucky charm.

He says he's so in love

He's finally got it right

I wonder if he knows

He's all I think about at night

I do appreciate the moments we spent talking. Some teachers stopped trying to make me regret coming late to class because they know that I'm the one to answer their questions and I'm the one to excel in their classes. I could say I have immunity; not even mentioning I'm Head Girl, I need to keep some privileges!

But soon we lost the topic in the conversation and then is when he mentions _her_. We always end up talking about her. How she makes him feel and how he must act just to keep her attention. If only he know that he has everything he needs just by being himself. I always end up telling him how women are. Then he smiles at me and plays with my hair while he laughs at my angry face. He treats me like a little sister and I don't know if I should feel privileged or sad that he only sees me as a family member.

He's the reason for the teardrops on my guitar

The only thing that keeps me wishing on a wishing star

He's the song in the car I keep singing

Don't know why I do

Then the night comes and the first thing I do as I enter our Common Room is look for him. If he is there, I go and talk to him or just accompany him while I read. If he isn't there, then I go to the kitchen, grab an ice cream bottle and then, I start eating while I think all the stuff they must be doing together.

When I finish the bottle, I go and take a shower. I let the water take the last traces of the tears I've cried while washing myself. I, then proceed to wash my face thoroughly to keep any sign of ever crying away. When he comes back he won't be willing to waste any time trying to talk to someone cause he would like to dream of her as soon as possible.

Drew walks by me

Can he tell that I can't breathe?

And there he goes, so perfectly

The kind of flawless I wish I could be

I see him as he passes by, I know he doesn't notice. If he did then he would have told me something. He is with one of his friends. I know he thinks he is not enough for her, but I wish I could show him we can become better people. We can change for the better if we truly want to.

She better hold him tight

Give him all her love

Look in those beautiful eyes

And know she's lucky 'cause

She is really lucky, finding someone with the same traits as him is really hard. I wish I were sure she loved him as much as I love him. That she would take care of him as strongly as I do. That she makes him know he can trust her as much as he trusts me.

She sure is lucky. He is a true gentleman, even when he didn't seem like one before. He treats you with respect and helps you as much as he can. He looks at you firmly in the eye and you can't help but have your legs wiggling. He surely doesn't know he has that power over me.

He's the reason for the teardrops on my guitar

The only thing that keeps me wishing on a wishing star

He's the song in the car I keep singing

Don't know why I do

This is one of those nights, the nights when I can't sleep. He has returned even later to the Common Room these past few days. He is almost never there at the end of the day. I've finished ALL my ice-cream bottles! I shall go to the Main Kitchen and steal some more from the house-elves. There is no food left to stop me from crying. The bathroom no longer erases the traces of my tears and I go to bed as soon as I go out of the shower. He can't look at my red face and puffy eyes. No, he would ask so many things.

So I drive home alone

As I turn out the light

I'll put his picture down

And maybe get some sleep tonight

Last night was intense, I couldn't sleep so I waited for him in the Common Room; but he never did come back. I watched the clock as it struck each hour and the doors to our "place" never opened. I was not going to my classes today, not with the exhaustion I had. I couldn't go down and face the world, not today. I wanted to stop being the "bookworm" just for today.

Though I had a strong will, my consciousness was stronger. I couldn't help but regret not taking classes. My silly responsibility and me. The only good thing about it was that he liked it, that, and my devotion to help people in need.

But as I went down the stairs to the first floor, so I could start my day with DADA, I saw something that broke my heart. i knew I didn't want to go to school today. But I needed to be the "bookworm" I've always been. Why couldn't I stop caring for the world?

'Cuz he's the reason for the teardrops on my guitar

The only one who's got enough of me to break my heart

He's the song in the car I keep singing

Don't know why I do

Because what I saw was that precious private moment every couple wants to have. The moment where you are so close to your love you forget about the world. I felt like an outsider as I watched that intimate moment. The moment where there is only you and that person. That is how it felt at least. You could see the students passing by and not paying attention to what was happening.

For some reason, I was at the same speed as them both. I could see, in slow motion, how their smiles were fading as they came closer and closer. I couldn't keep it together could I? My eyes were going redder as they kept coming closer. A rebellious tear fell from my eyes as he cut the distance short.

Because, just in front of me, he was kissing her. And the world seemed to have stopped, waiting for them to stop their affections. I hoped this were just a nightmare, one I could wake up and forget the next second. Everyone else was going at my time, the real one, even though I was the one looking at him. The other students could clearly see my tears as they fell slowly.

He's the time taken up but there's never enough

And he's all that I need to fall into

Drew looks at me

I fake a smile so he won't see

Because I was Hermione Granger and I didn't have a place in his world. Because all this time I never stood a chance against her. She really was perfect, especially for someone of her status. But, even then, even when I knew there always was someone else, I couldn't let my hopes come down. Because he sums everything I need in a man, I wouldn't change a thing. And that is why, as Draco Malfoy came near me, I wiped my tears and faked a smile.

-Hey, Hermione!- I heard him- I want you to meet someone. She reached his side and smiled at me.

-Hello Hermione, Draco couldn't stop talking about you, I feel like I know you already- she said and prepared for a handshake- I'm Astoria Greengrass, I'm so glad to finally meet you!


End file.
